1. |
||||
I wouldn’t care for the sun
If daylight was all I knew
So thank God for the clouds that come
And paint black over placid blue
It’s a lesson in resilience
I’ll scream and pray and I’ll get through this
It’s always dark before the dawn
Clichéd I know but prove it wrong
I guess the hardship of the last few years
Has turned me into at least a fragment of who I can be
And the tempering I never asked for
Has made me stronger and has helped my eyes to see only you
Even when they are failing
Rorschach your shapes
Are hanging in the sky like omens
But I am not defined or bound by them
I am redeemed by Christ, my hope’s in Him
He’s all I need for this life
And all I’ll ever need for all that’s after
Oh God, please come and fill me now
Life is empty without you
|
||||
2. |
Dig Me Up
01:25
|
|||
Don’t wanna live for vanity
Don’t wanna live for vanity
Don’t wanna live for Vanity- I don’t
Misery and apathy
And their best friend anxiety
Are piling dirt on top of me
Come dig me out
Don’t let this get the best of me
Don’t let this monster trample me
Please show me all that I can be with you
God, I’ve got this thing inside of me
A hidden room that no one sees
And I am sick of this disease
Come dig me out
Don’t you think it’s funny
How the dirt just piles up on me?
|
||||
3. |
||||
Grey skies lead to grey minds
I don’t know much more than I did last year
So many chances came and went- and I’m still standing here
I’ve demonised my thoughts, I’ve demonised my mind
Jesus I want to be like you but I always seem to find
Myself failing, falling, sinking and blindly reaching out in the dark
And I’ve got so much to ask you burning a hole in my heart
If grey skies lead to grey minds
Why don’t open skies lead to open minds?
If we just looked hard, then we would find our hearts
Why don’t we look so we can find ourselves?
It seems like greying skies lead to a greying mind
And a displaced mind leads to a darkening sky
If we just looked hard, then we might all find our hearts
And find ourselves
I’ll scream this out until my heart believes
‘Til my lungs collapse and I am pushing up daisies
I am a product of anxiety and my mistakes
This heart and soul are yours. I need you here- come save me
Here’s not where I want to be
But it’s closer than where you’ve been
Here’s not where I want to be
My son, come and find your rest in me
|
||||
4. |
||||
Come inside and bring your chisels
And all the tools you need to do your trade
Because I’m made of rough edges
And fixing that just can’t be done my own way
Renovate this black knot I call a heart
Even if you tear the whole damn thing apart
Believing you can fix me is as scary as what’s happening to me
I surrender. Use this to make me something I can’t be
On my own
Belief is not saying “we believe”
And belief is not believing we believe
Belief in something is when we act as though it were true
I give up my life for the rest of my life
Because I want to truly live
|
||||
5. |
S.A.F.E.
03:38
|
|||
I want this one buried somewhere
Lost inside of record two
Where it’s got the least chance of being heard
Or much less dwelled on by you
I’m hoping it will be just as cathartic
As all the songs that’ve come before
Depth, Atlantis, Negative Space and now this
Don’t look at my sleeve ‘cause my heart’s on the floor
I'm sitting beside it
I think that I’ll lie down and try get some sleep
And while I am dreaming
I’ll try to keep from dreaming of you
I never had cause to write you a song
Save for unrequited love
But that’s just misery with added investment
And I’ve had enough
I swore I wouldn’t write for you
You’d never hear it anyway
But depravity bends my will to bow bow and break
Until I’m drowning in the depth of your name
I’m saying I’m sorry
To the one who inspired the EP
I’m saying I’m sorry
To the one one who’s a thousand miles across the sea
You flickered in and out of my life
Like I sometimes phase in and out
Salient one second, forgotten the next
And you’ll never hear what I’m screaming about
All you’ll ever hear is me screaming
|
||||
6. |
||||
Cancer took your livelihood
And in ’16 you died in Vancouver
A constant changed the day you left
I honestly thought this would go sooner
You were supposed to show me how to see the best in me
You were supposed to pave the way
But now you’re gone- the bell jar’s down
And I’m suffocating waiting for who I might be one day
It feels like I am suspended in the air
Liminal for sure, but not okay
I’m in the space between two places
Having lost the safety of yesterday
Goodbye is forever, but you’re not really gone
And until I infest therefore I am- it’s goodbye and so long
I wonder what the weather’s like in Vancouver this time of year
Would I let God down if I let my guard down?
But I can never let God down, because I never held him up
All the words you screamed which tore your throat to shreds
Are nestled in my head, and I will never forget them or you
And there are no words I can find to say how much you mean to me
You showed me what music could be, and now all I can do
Is wonder what the weather’s like in Vancouver this time of year
And if it would be worth my time to cross the world so I could find you there
But for now it’s goodbye and so long from me- thank you for helping me see
That I can never let God down, because I never held him up
It was, is and always will be the other way around
And that will never change, no matter what they call the ground under my feet
|
||||
7. |
Lonely Weather
02:42
|
|||
Sometimes I don’t think it’s safe to be around you
You always seem to do the worst things to my mind
God help me 'cause it happens all the time
I could say you’re all harlots, you’re all wraiths
You’re all vultures, and you’re all snakes
But I’d be better served with an anchor around my neck and diving into a lake
I can’t make this any better for myself and I am sorry
But I sure as hell won’t let you make it worse
If I’m a thorn in my side at the best of times
What am I at the worst?
Hating myself and all of you is easier than pulling all of these splinters out
I know it’s not just me dying, but it seems I’m always saying
“Oh, God please come and save me- I’ve lost my way and life is raining”
I think maybe I’d do better to wear these words on my heart instead
“Hallelujah- He is strongest when I cave in!”
But I never do
Every blessing that you’ve given me
Feels like it will be ripped away (because of this lonely weather)
Because even though you call me home, and call me by my name
I’m worshipping anxiety (and I can’t think straight in this lonely weather)
And it…
Wears me right down, ‘til I can’t stand again
It wears me right down ‘til I can’t stand again
|
||||
8. |
Low (feat. Lily Mou)
03:12
|
|||
Writing was security
Oh God, it seems eternity
Is the void between a good idea
And the ink stains I call words that I vomit here
Tomorrow never comes but yesterday
Hangs like a spectre over me
And the lies that I consume so willingly
Are the dirt upon the shovel that’s slowly burying me
God, I looked outward and found nothing
Looked inward and found that it was much the same
Why the hell do I keep forgetting to look up
When I’m struggling to put fingers to keys or a pen to a blank page
I never thought that I would be
Cursing my extremities
That I used to guide so willingly
Across the strings and pages that have come to be
Empty, empty, empty- I am
All out of ideas with no back up plan
Crack my ribs so the void inside has a place to go
I feel so empty sometimes- God you know I feel alone
Take my weary head and lay it low
Take my broken heart and slowly make it whole
|
||||
9. |
Where Have You Been?
02:36
|
|||
Where have you been
While we’ve been bleeding
All over our guitars and onto the floors
Of half-empty dive bars?
You said you were surprised
By how much we had changed
As if you’d been beside us
Every single step of the way
Let your words carry some damn weight
Come watch us ruin our hands and our lungs
Not out of misplaced pity
Come show your face
I’ll be disgraced
Far too much to play this song
But I’ve got a funny feeling
That when you finally find the time
All of this will be dead, buried, and gone
I don’t care
I’m just being honest
All of this will be dead, buried, and gone
|
||||
10. |
Lost Boys
03:19
|
|||
Lost- so far from what this was
But are we lost?
I’d say it’s a matter of perspective
And mine has changed because
I’m finally spilling my heart
Rather than blood from my hands
Everyone moving on as we find new life
Did we forget to grow up or just stay on dry land
While you drowned who you are to fit in
It took the better half of a decade
To get the point across
This isn’t just a game
It’s a way to say that we are weary but we haven’t lost yet
How did we end up here?
Lost- so far from what this was
But are we lost?
I’d say it’s a matter of perspective
And mine has changed because
It’s all in what you make of it
We give it all because it’s all we’ve got
|
||||
11. |
Atlantis
03:20
|
|||
I can’t get used to this
This will not be my swan song
But it may well be a phoenix death
And a step toward moving on
If home’s where the heart is
Then my home is in ruins
Not because it’s been broken
But ‘cause it beats for a million things
If home’s where the heart is
Then my home is a travesty
That I’ve created by staring at the sea
Trying to find one thing to make it sing
I’d rather live in chaos
In a crowded city built by man
Than die down here in Atlantis on my own
With no sign of land
|
||||
12. |
||||
I don’t know why I expect you
To dive into the void I make when I hear your name
There’s nothing past that save for vanity
Yet in my head you’re my April Rain
God, I can’t have heard you clearly
I swore you said she was made for me
Peace would embrace me if I knew either way
But fear of the unknown paints me in misery
So what should I do instead?
I’ve asked you and myself this before, and still don’t know
I swore I wouldn’t hang myself up on anyone else
But here I am, at the mercy of a recursive heart- and so it goes
I can’t stop creating fantasy and choking on nostalgia
It’s so regular and saccharine and it makes me sick
God you are purpose- yet I’ve made her my anchor… again
So call me out. Call from the deep
Down, down, down
Where are the stirrings of old?
I am afraid of walking out onto the stormy sea
I am terrified of drowning, but with you I know I never have to be
I never have to be
I don’t need an April Rain to define me or to keep me sane
You gave up everything- I just give up on everything.
Yet you still call my name
You still call my name
|
Chasing South Auckland, New Zealand
Chaotic Post-Hardcore from Auckland, New Zealand.
Chris Dies- Vocals,
Guitar
Micah Fleming- Bass, Vocals
Jacob Owen- Guitar, Vocals
Ngariki Muru- Drums, Vocals
facebook.com/chasingsouth for contact and shows
... more
Streaming and Download help
If you like Chasing South, you may also like:
Bandcamp Daily your guide to the world of Bandcamp